Seaside Radio

Seaside Radio Episode Eighteen

Seaside Radio has done it! 

We have ripped the cassette tape, of our final episode of this series, from the cold smelly hands of Jill Gold, the harsh rubbish mistress of Seaside Councils Refuse Collection Agency.

The nominal fee was paid and to rebuff punters who thought we should have just paid the fine ...Renowned DJ Ronnie Keith remarked “6.50 might by a pie but doesn’t by integrity” 

SO what is in this final episode you may ask? 

Well for one, we hear more of the life drama doc series ‘Trevor doesn’t liver here anymore’ about a shop assistant who doesn’t want to be one anymore. 

Then we have sponsorship add from the Vinyl and Cassette manufacturers Music to Do stuff by

We get a treat to celebrate the 20th year anniversary of Mr. Allen, the Chief Engineer of Seasides Water Utilities Plant by hearing the audio from his original job interview 20 years ago. Fortunately we couldn’t go through with his original request to air his mesmerising three-hour Solo Musical Dance Recital called "Elvis and his Love Affair with Peanut Butter," as the cassette tape is a short play one.

And to keep up with matters of today we stole the live recording of Gerald and Chatuese Brick, owners of Bricks and Borders Land Holders, as they faced extortion by a group of orcas, resulting in significant damage to their boat and a potential substantial insurance claim  

And what’s really been driving this series to a finale of 18 is Seasides Radio Theatre’s famous episodic radio play "Sue and The Seacow”.  Which also is at its almost conclusive end. Did our two heroes Sue and Gwen make it out alive and did they save their Seacow friend or were they devoured at sea by a Irakangee Seafarms escaped hybrid Seacow and Squid Monster?

And as you sadly reach the end of this episode you may wonder is this the end of Seaside Radio 

Well wonder less, it's not …if you looked at our website and see the picture Manny drew about the underwater pensioner , then you may have guessed its coming soon…and it is …soon ..”The Underwater Pensioner”

 

 

Seaside Radio Episode Seventeen

It's Episode Seventeen! The second last episode of this long-form audio series!!!

 

This week's excerpts of audible delights come courtesy of the Social and Anti-Social Media Facilities Group. They have condensed a month's worth of TV, Internet, Spy Cameras, Radio and general gossip in Seaside into 15 minutes of fun, for you and the rest of you. 

 

First up we hear how the “Home Ware Centres” HR department deals with escaped shop assistants and why the “Home for Socially Broken” isn’t like home at all, unless your parents were passive-aggressive types. Those poor shop assistants.

 

There’s the advertisement for The Responsibilities - a private company dedicated to taking responsibility for anything you have done, provided you are up for paying their reasonable price.

 

We have a brush with the infamous Seaside Police service who are well known for their upselling and staking out speed spots like parking lots and drive-thrus

 

Once well-regarded vocalist Sydney Gold manages to sneak into “Do at Ron Rons Music and Voice Over Studio” and try to record a musical track with his sister, Jill.

 

And lastly, those of you committed to the Sue and Seacow serial will be glad to know The Evil General Manager gets a series of wins and the nosy kids harassing him possibly have gotten their comeuppance.

 

Good Listening Everyone!

Seaside Radio Episode Sixteen

It's been enough time so here it is...Episode 16 !

Thanks to the Seaside Elementary Schools Radio Theatre and TV workshop (and their teacher Oliva Herenow), we have another great 15 minute compilation of Radio, Theatre and TV that’s been recently heard and seen in Seaside!

First up is “Trevor Doesn’t work here anymore“ - the thrilling first part of a three part escape story about a store clerk called Trevor escaping his appointed store and the fascist clutches of the ‘Supermarket Security’!

We then are privy to the infamous and fortunate demise of a local community DJ who has spent too much time in a studio talking to himself and playing Billy Joel.

There is the pilot play from the Seaside Theatre Workshops called “Modern Vlad” - A vampire that is not very good at it. And then there is the song called “Modern Vlad”

We managed to secure the third last episode of Sue and The Seacow. In this episode, the general manager seacows are lining up in a row - who has two seacow beasts in his control and plans to get them cloned - It all hangs on 2 little girls that have probably drowned and a prime minister

And special thanks to our in-house band The Seats and as always the man with the velvet tongue DJ Ronnie Keith!

Seaside Radio Episode Fifteen

It is time for another episode of everybody's favourite bathroom listening pastime !

And this week it's super contentious! 

We first listen to the controversial commentating of Ronnie Keith with his infamous plug for Walters Rum during the Lunge Competition between Kira Blunt and Mary Bell!

Then it's the Seaside Theatre Group aka Seaside Radio Theatre Groups tendentious radio play which was sponsored by the Teen Health Advice Corporation-" Brandon Washes His Plate " The play was soon banned by teenagers and adults alike when it as revealed the Teen Health Advice Corporation staff were mainly pre-teen!

And a throwback to call of the most arresting of races the "5km Cycle Sprint For People Whose Name Rhyme with Spaghetti" the race which was supposed to be held in the parking lot of Tristans Pets and Anchors became a media sensation when after a complaint by other people whose name rhyme with Spaghetti got the organisers arrested.

And thankfully it's the 15th Episode of Sue and The Seacow, controversial because we are finally told the School Bully's real name.

 

Happy Listening!

 

Seaside Radio Episode Fourteen

YES !!!

Our radio dispatch of what’s audibly good in Seaside is here! Episode 14 or as we lovingly refer to it, Seaside Radio Episode 14!  

This week we ride the coattails of the internationally famous first name - Karen. 

Karen Bags' brother is also the sugarer at “Meats are Treats” Meat Sweet Shop! And he said he had some clandestine recordings he took of his sister , Karen. So we bought them. He reckons if you listen for more than a few minutes you can hear the transition in her voice after years of pretending to talk like a computer. He even had an excerpt from his song ‘Karen’, paid for by her. So we bought that too.

 

We put in some pirated  DJ Ronnie Keith classics, which his manger said was okay as long as we didn’t keep the swear words in.

 

Sue and The Seacow returns for another episode and after listening we can see how Irakangee Seafarms General Manager won his Community Award for “The Worst Father Ever!” 

 

And finally because we had time on the cassette tape we released an excerpt of our DJ ALex’s continuing meltdown with himself just after he played a song from band called Stoutfinger, called "3 Day Week", about a four day weekend.

 

Happy Seaside Everybody!

Seaside Radio Episode Thirteen

Due to the two month strike by the “Maritime Corporate Executive and Luxury Boat Owners Union” we were not able to get our radio ferry to international waters. That meant we could not broadcast our 15 minute audible dispatch to our 14 listeners and someones mum. 

 

We may not have got the dispatch out at all if it wasn’t for Tristan from ‘Tristans Pet and Anchors’. He had a ‘flash sale’ on Gold Danforth Anchors and Miniature Zebras. That seemed to entice 3 luxury boat persons who docked their massive boats and gave enough room for our ferry to get out of the Infamous ‘Starboard Port’.

 

In this episode we sneak a look at the Infamous “Jims To Die For Resturaunt” where irregular clients, Bob and Betty Boil try to get sick without paying.

 

We still have brilliant foreign two piece The Seats- who are working off their 21 year community service by playing live every time on our dispatches - it doesn’t sound like it but they are. Good Onya lads

 

Mr Microphone Ronnie Keith lent us his voice and even unwisely let his producer Bruce Mate pick some songs, like, “The Lil Snips” with their average hit, ‘Mum Why Did You Cut Me There’ . Bruce also coordinated the sponsorship song for our principal funder ‘Eileens Cat Canneries’ and for the use of her computer and notepads we play,  “Kill all the Horses” by Stoutfinger

 

Excitingly, one of our DJ’s ,Alex, had a nervous breakdown on air and we managed to hear that too. And lastly ‘The Seaside Theatre Groups’ serial production ‘Sue and The Seacow’ gets its next episode played. In this episode our heroic girls come face too tentacles with the hybrid Octopus Cow and Captain Hades gets to confront his bully.

 

Safe Listening Everyone!!!

Seaside Radio Episode Twelve

We are back! Bit late but back. We were on point to break the “World Record for the Longest Pause Between Sentences On Air until Bruce Mate nodded off and started talking in his sleep, 72 days into the event 3 days shy of the record. So we can now finally release our interns 12th episode of collected audible bits from all the available radio, tv and hidden microphone systems in Seaside. Thanks to the 24hr recording capabilities in the Announcers Booth at the Seaside Wind Fair we were able to give you the whole controversial incident that was this years Kids Mayor for a day Thanks to our ongoing commitment to Ronnie Keith we have some of his audible gems. And spare a thought for the people at 43U, someone there gave the wrong number to Ronnie Keith and he did his very expensive outside broadcast feed to rival shopping centre radio station 2CC Every week we give you music and this weeks song is from ‘The Hesitant’s’ with ‘Underpants Girl’ Plus we have the next episode of the thrilling series Sue and The Seacow where we listen to how crap the General Manager and Captain Hades really are and how close Seacow vomit became a kids refreshing drink That s’right!

Seaside Radio Episode Eleven

It’s the 11th Episode! Copywriters spent the last twelve weeks compiling a beautiful concise and less wordy introduction for this dispatch but due to financial difficulties we were unable to buy it. This week on our Seaside Radio dispatch we start with the CCTV audio recording of a Court Appointed Social Media Class. The one infamously known for leaking the footage of the Prime Minister assaulting a kitten. We managed to get Legendary DJ Ronnie Keith to sell us some of his audible off cuts and then it’s Seasides Radio contribution to “The Who Are They Now?” week by playing alot of stuff featuring Sydney Gold, from Sydney Gold and The Convicts. Fun Fact: Sydneys album, “Let There Be Gold” has been the only album repeatedly dropped from the Big Family Budgets $1 dollar chuck out bin. Thanks to the ‘Musicians Working for Food’ bartering system at Seaside we have the popular recording of ‘Goils’ by the band Stoutfinger. They lovingly traded the rights to this song for a plate of Sultana biscuits and 10 litres of Mango Mullet Chowder Finishing up our dispatch is the next episode in the popular Comedy, Mystery Adventure Drama Sue and The Seacow. This week the lives of a Captain and his Mate are held in the balance by Ronnie Keith and his Vinyl Copy of Myra Palms Confused? Don’t be …It all makes sense when you listen to Episode 11!!!

Seaside Radio Episode Ten

It's the first double digit episode !!! And to celebrate Ronnie Keith's next door neighbour has donated three cats to the Irakangee Seafarms Maintenance Shed! This weeks audible dispatch is recorded from Karen Bags H.M.V Capri Radio, which she acquired when it was thrown out the of a moving boat back in 1986, hitting her brother in the ear. Karen who now uses the alias 'Megan Wate' reckons her favourite part of the 15 minute episode is the doco on 'Harvey Bloom', the only person known to use his sense of smell to taste, touch, listen and annoy. We catch some instrumental music from The Seats with their Bingo hit “Kimichi Trench” Ronnie Keith's Velvet tongue is backing wisping the airwaves with his news and views. There is an add for Viking Funerals the only choice for those wanting burial at sea. We have the infamous, live not live, pirated broadcast repeat of The Beak Poets reciting their favourite poetry by their favourite poet Jonathan Livingston Person at the Fothergills Cafe and Costume Hire. And thanks to mum's copyright clearances we also kept in the amazing hit from 'The Seat Gulls' with the song 'Jonathan Livingston Person'. And lastly the Sue and The Seacow's next episode is here. The two kids are out at sea looking for their seacow friend when they come into contact with what is described as a 'not normal seacow' and then the stupidest ship in Seaside the 'Nuclear Weapon' which makes a real nuisance of itself. Happy listening and don’t forget to wash !!

Seaside Radio Episode Nine

Is it finally time for a new episode?!? Yes , Yes it is, time. And special thanks to the Nudgee Beach Pigeon Club for sneaking the compact discs through the various borders. Obviously said pigeons and compact discs were in quarantine before they were uploaded to the unsaid computers. So what's in this episode I hear me ask? We take a listen to careers day at Seaside Elementary 1H where kids are either inspired or hired to get a quick start to an enthralling career of accounting or squid hunting Ronnie Keith lets us sneak onto the set of his latest television advertisement, he feeds us some excerpts from his own private radio station 43U and accidently lets us hear the hit song from The Wandering Frogmen. What else? Well, we keep you caught up with the Comedy, Mystery, Adventure, Drama...Sue and the Seacow! It's Episode 9 and The General Manager of Irakangee Seafarms starts to reveal to his faithful lawyer Walter, the truth of the Seacow Patties and a secret weapon to catch the freak seacow monster. Enjoy Seasiders!!!